Career, Health/Life

How to become more confident: expert strategies and tips

be more confident (1)

What are the best ways to become more confident? Our guide outlines 10 simple strategies to boost confidence, and explains the science that make them work.

Do you often feel that everyone else is better, faster, more talented and confident than you? Here are the best tips to boost your self-confidence!

Nobody has to spend their life as a shy wallflower, because everyone can work on themselves to become more confident. “The prerequisite is the will and the conscious decision to bring about positive changes,” says Tatjana Strobel, an expert on human knowledge.

How to respond to rude people

Accept that it takes time

Sure, getting more confident doesn’t happen overnight, says Dr.  Herbert Mück, specialist for psychosomatic medicine and psychotherapy: “A weak self-esteem always has to do with the individual personality. As is well known, this cannot be changed at the push of a button. You should therefore allow yourself enough time.”

But with small changes and tricks, each of us can work on ourselves every day and thus become more self-confident in the long run. 

Advanced ways to build confidence

10 things you can do to become more confident

List your strengths

Most people with little self-confidence only see their weaknesses. This needs to be changed. With these tips it works:

Tip 1:
“Think of your top 30 strengths and write them down. Ask yourself: What makes you unique? What are you particularly good at? Why do other people appreciate you? What would these people lack if you were wouldn’t be around you anymore? ” advises Tatjana Strobel.

Tip 2:
“Anyone who comes up with weaknesses should also accept them. No one is perfect! The different mix of strengths and weaknesses gives each of us an individual profile and makes us so unique. When someone stands in front of others about their weaknesses , that is a sign of strength! “says Dr. Herbert Mück.

Keep a diary

The day was bad? Do you think! Open your eyes and change your perspective!

Tip 1:
“Keep a diary. Write down every evening what you did particularly well on that day, what you are proud of, what compliments and feedback you received. Also write down what you were afraid of, but what you did with flying colors In this book, always read at moments when you lose faith in yourself, “says Tatjana Strobel.

Tip 2:
“Get into the habit of giving yourself at least a compliment before going to bed that relates to the previous day. You don’t have to have done everything well Allow mistakes – provided you are ready to learn from them, “says Dr. Herbert Mück.

Look in the mirror!

Do you find other women more attractive and yourself boring? Look at you! You have just as many reasons to be confident and proud of yourself.

Tip 1:
“Stand naked in front of the mirror and find beautiful spots on your body and on your face. Take your time and concentrate exclusively on your beautiful sides! Repeat this every day until you have found at least 10 strengths. These 10 strengths you should write it down, “says Tatjana Strobel.

Tip 2:
“Pay attention to your body language. Always make sure in front of the mirror that you stand upright and above all don’t let your head and shoulders hang. to act confidently and you will be amazed how your self-esteem grows all by itself, “says Dr. Herbert Mück.

Body feedback

It is not uncommon for your own negative mood to show up in your posture. Change that by sending positive signals to your body. Your posture tells your counterpart more than you think.

Tip 1 :
“Work on your body feedback! Stand with your feet hip-width apart, stabilize your upper body, hold your head up as if you were wearing a crown that shouldn’t fall off. Extend your arms up for a minute or two. This exercise signals self-confidence to your brain. It automatically produces testosterone, which also makes you strong internally, “says Tatjana Strobel.

Tip 2:
“Practice the ‘mouth angle lifter’: If you are in a bad mood or have bad feelings, stick your toothbrush or a coffee spoon between your teeth in your mouth for a minute or two. This movement pulls the muscles of your face up, especially the mouth angle lifters. The brain becomes fooled that you are fine. It emits happiness and the negative mood is blown away.”

Muzzle for the inner critic

Our inner voice is our hardest critic. Therefore: give her a muzzle!

Tip 1:
“Practice consistently shouting ‘stop’ internally whenever doubts and pejorative thoughts come up in you (‘you can’t do anything …!’, ‘You would have better …’) these moments of going through the list of your personal skills and achievements internally, “says Dr. Herbert Mück.

Tip 2:
If something works 50 percent, people with little self-confidence will only ever see the missing half and what they cannot do. Train yourself in appreciation and try to see what is there and not what is missing. Throw everyone Whenever you think something self-deprecating, five euros in a piggy bank. You can give yourself a little pleasure from the money you have accumulated.

No comparisons

Those who are dissatisfied with themselves like to compare themselves to (supposedly happier) people and feel even more miserable. A vicious cycle that needs to be ended.

Tip 1:
“You almost always find people who are more successful, more attractive and more carefree than yourself. But does such knowledge really help you? Especially since it is based on your own personal assessment and can also be completely wrong. As long as you are with comparing others, you are blocking your view of yourself, “says Dr. Herbert Mück.

Tip 2:
“Instead of looking at the others, you should ask yourself:What skills already distinguish me? Which do I have to develop? Don’t set your standards too high. Rather start to be proud of what already exists and what already makes you unique. “

Have an opinion!

Insecure people have become accustomed to constantly justifying themselves and just not attracting attention.

Tip 1:
“Practice expressing your opinion even if this could result in disadvantages for you. Stand by your beliefs and values ​​and be authentic and genuine. Stop playing a role just to be liked by others. Be proud of yourself your personality and your own opinion – even if others don’t like it, “advises Dr. Herbert Mück.

Tip 2:
“It is also very important how you say something. Pay attention to your voice. Speak calmly and firmly, say ‘I’ instead of ‘man’ or ‘we’. Make it clear what you want (‘I want’ ) and waive submissiveness and justification speeches.

The people around you

Use the positive power of other people instead of isolating yourself from them.

Tip 1:
“Demand a review. Ask the people around you what they like about you and what is special about you. You will be surprised! At the same time, stop asking yourself what strangers might think of you. Even if someone thinks negatively about you, it is only their opinion and not the objective truth, “says Dr. Herbert Mück.

Tip 2:
“Try to expand your circle of acquaintances. Create a network of good friends, for example by refreshing previous acquaintances or going to a sports club or to events where you can meet like-minded people.”

15 traits of confident people

Self-confidence not only makes you sexy – at least 85 percent of men think so – it also makes many things in life easier. Reason enough to learn a few things from self-confident women.

1. You believe in yourself

They don’t see their weaknesses all the time, they focus on their strengths. A clever move that gives strength.

2. You also think of yourself

It is good to help other people. That makes us happy and satisfied. But sometimes you have to think of yourself. And that is what confident women do. You take a day for the ego, treat yourself to something, do something good for yourself – this has to be every now and then to fill up your reserves.

3. You don’t get angry with yourself forever

If you make a mistake, you don’t suffer from guilt for months, but at some point you let it go. Life goes on and you have to be able to forgive yourself.

4. You take your life in your own hands

They don’t moan and wait for a solution to be handed to them on a silver platter. You find the solution yourself!

5. You dare something

Take the first step, be brave, show yourself a bit. Of course, you can only do that if you’re a confident guy, and if you can’t, you shouldn’t force yourself to do it. But: It helps tremendously to achieve your own goals, sometimes to take an uncomfortable, risky step.

6. You say no sometimes

There are enough yes-sayers. Confident people sometimes say no when necessary. After all, nobody can ALWAYS be helpful and perfect.

7. You learn from mistakes

… and apologize when you are wrong – without ifs and buts.

8. You are authentic

You try to be nobody else or run after any ideal picture. They are simply themselves because they know: I am great the way I am. 

9. You like yourself

And that just rubs off on your environment. There is something about the saying “Only those who love themselves can be loved”. One more reason to like yourself.

10. You think for yourself

They have their own heads and think, feel and act according to their own considerations and ideas. Be adjusted and swim with the masses? Nope Why?

11. You don’t constantly compare yourself to others

Everyone knows that the constant comparison makes unhappy. Nevertheless everyone does it – except for the self-confident women. They do it right and don’t compare themselves to others.

12. You listen

This does not mean grunting and nodding politely after every third sentence, but REALLY listening.

13. You are open in love

Confident women don’t always doubt whether their date likes them or not. They are positive about it, laugh, beam. That makes every date better – and also acts pretty sexy on the other side.

14. You are loud

Confident people talk loudly, laugh loudly, talk freely. That helps their environment. Because with them you usually always know where you are.

15. You just go through life positively

If you are positive and believe in yourself, you will have more fun in life. At least more than the one who says to himself every day that it will be a VERY bad day. Who cares about retirement at the age of 18 and thinks of skin cancer on a sunny day. Thinking positive can change the world. Do not forget.

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