After daycare is before hell! Why children often buck, roar and go crazy after daycare and how parents can change this with a few tips. After the kindergarten, many children have to discharge themselves emotionally. Our guide explains how to avoid child tantrums after daycare.
I imagined it so nicely: working in the office for half a day, then picking up my little darling from the daycare and spending a relaxing afternoon together. In fact, there is no trace of relaxation. The job in the office is stressful. I almost never manage to be in the daycare on time. And what I then find is a powder keg: from squeaky over-turned to stubborn, defiant, junk to highly sensitive and tired. Every day I get to know a different low position that the scale of childish emotions has to offer. And in any case, I step on very, very thin ice as soon as I walk through the door to the daycare.
My 3-year-old , who, according to the educator, was just pure sunshine, mutated to the end of the daycare center to a nervous endurance test — for herself and for me as a mother.
“Wasn’t he really looking forward to me?” I ask the teacher. “Yes, he did,” she replies. “That’s why he lets his emotions run free.” Please? I do not understand that! The teacher explains that it is even a sign of a good bond. The child has enough trust and the feeling of being unconditionally loved to show me how it feels right now. And after a long day at daycare, that’s not always just happiness. You need to avoid child tantrums after daycare.
After all, there is a lot of pounding on my son in the daycare center: he has to learn to deal with conflicts with other children, to follow the daycare rules, to get to know new things every day, to concentrate, to withstand volume or to share attention. This and much, much more make kindergarten a strenuous full-time job for a mini-man. And when his parents are there, he just wants to be allowed to be the way he feels.
Understandable. Nevertheless, it would be nice if the free afternoons with my son did not start regularly with tears, anger and defiance. The change in perspective helped me the most. Not to ask why it is often so exhausting for me, but how I can help my child to relax better after the daycare.
Strategies to avoid child tantrums after daycare
Many children want to discharge themselves emotionally after the daycare or kindergarten day. Parents who are in the line of fire not only keep their nerves with these tried and tested tips, but also help the child to be more balanced.
1. time to change the situation
Children who are still immersed in play in the daycare often react stubbornly and irritably when the parents tear them out of the game and want to take them home immediately. Bring a little more time, if possible, so that the child can finish the puzzle or finish listening to the story and be better prepared for the change of situation.
2. anticipation
What can also help are small anticipations that are created in the morning before picking up. For example, you can agree with your child that you can walk past the playground on the way home, feed the ducks, or jump into every puddle.
3. Reliable Routines
Children need fixed processes and rituals. After a stressful day, they can react irritably if dad instead of, as promised mom, picks them up from the daycare. Tell your child in the morning who will come to pick you up in the afternoon – and keep this appointment.
4. Free time
Tired or over-the-top children in particular need time and space after the daycare to refuel. Purchases, appointments or parent-child groups only create more stimuli. Go home with your child and focus on what they would like to do. Maybe cuddle, watch a book or play?
5. Pay attention
When mom or dad chats with other parents while picking up, is lost in thought or on the phone, children often don’t really feel seen and react angrily to it. When you pick up your child, dedicate yourself fully to your child and tell them how happy you are that you now have undivided time for each other.
6. hunger
Some children are just hungry after daycare. A small snack can often quickly and noticeably improve the mood.
7. Reward and relaxation program
Of course, after the daycare center, no child should sit in front of the television and eat chocolate for hours. It still deserves a little pampering. Arrange a fixed time for enjoyment time together. Maybe it should watch a show, eat a piece of cake or have a small massage given by mom?
8. Take a deep breath
And the most important tip: If you are stressed yourself, it is difficult for your child to have the necessary patience and help the child to relax. Before you pick up, take a little moment to be clear about the following day. Take a deep breath, finish your job consciously and try to get involved with what comes. Namely a child who is looking forward to mom or dad. And that the more relaxed mom and dad are themselves, the faster their inner unrest can go away.
Find more parenting guides in our Parent/Child section.
