Parenting/Children

How to stop children fighting: expert strategies and tips

How to stop children fighting

The fact is that small quarrels are completely normal among children of all ages. In many cases, children quarrel quickly and they then can be friends with each other again, and the reasons for a quarrel are mostly forgotten shortly afterwards. But sometimes you just need to intervene. Here is how to stop children fighting.

1. Learning to argue is important

When children and especially siblings fight, that’s not always the end of the world. Small quarrels have an important role in children’s developmentOnly then can they learn to deal with other people and develop an appropriate culture of debate. Employment for children with disputes and conflict resolution is very important. If you do not learn this, you will always have problems dealing with disputes even as adults.

As a rule, such disputes tend to arise in larger groups, such as at school, so if you have any questions, you should also turn to the educators.

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2. How to stop children fighting: explain to them

In general, it is important for parents to develop certain strategies for conflicting children. Also, you should be concerned with the causes of the strife of your children. Conflicts often occur when friendships break down or when there is conflict in the family between parents. 

You, as a parent, should not interfere in your children’s quarrels. Otherwise, the little ones themselves can not develop the ability to adequately handle conflicts. Nevertheless, there are certain disputes in which you should intervene, when you need to know how to stop children fighting.

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2.1 In these cases, intervention should take place:

On the one hand, intervention is required if the disputes become palpable. After all, the children should learn from the beginning that violence is not part of an appropriate culture of debate. In particular, smaller children often argue about fisticuffs such as hitting, scratching, biting or pulling their hair because they do not yet have the verbal ability to argue only with words. When a toddler is hurt, intervention is inevitable. 

Older children, on the other hand, are often able to verbally handle their quarrels, so you do not have to intervene immediately. Of course, certain limits, such as the use of swear words should be consistently adhered to. It’s easier with a couple, so always include both parents in the dispute resolution. In general, you should also keep track of how often and in which situation disputes occur so you can better know how to stop children fighting.   

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3. Dispute mediators or mediators in schools

How to stop children fighting

In many schools, children and adolescents are now being trained as so-called dispute mediators , who help to resolve conflicts between their classmates and calm down constantly conflicting children . In the majority of cases, the parties to the dispute voluntarily undertake to clarify the conflict, although the solution process is always accompanied by teachers. For many children, the aggression disappeared through the use of trained personnel. Ultimately, however, the so-called dispute resolution programs are based on the approach that conflicting children must learn to resolve their conflicts and disputes as independently as possible and above all responsibly.

4. Constant dispute as an expression of problems

In some cases, it is also observed with individual children, that they are always in dispute and every little quarrel causes strife. In such cases, you should monitor the behavior of the child in dealing with other children more closely and also talk to the child about possible causes of his behavior. In many cases, the reasons can already be found out in the conversation and work out solutions when a toddler skin. For example, breaking friendships and removing caregivers from the child often leads to defensive reactions and aggression.However, if you feel that the cause of the child’s contentious behavior is deeper or not easily understood, friendship becomes meaningless, or the sibling quarrel does not end there for years, you may need help.

Do not be shy to seek professional advice. In this way, possible undesirable developments can be caught and corrected in advance.

How to stop children fighting: dealing with jealousy

However, you should not worry about the child’s development when dealing with their frequent quarrels, especially with regard to the sibling dispute. If siblings feel jealous, they quarrel very often, especially at certain stages of development, as rivalry among siblings is important for demarcation and individual development. Often, jealousy makes siblings quarrel among themselves. In most cases, the conflicts disappeared as children grew older, even though many parents whose children seem to be constantly arguing can not imagine a lessening of conflicts.

However, certain sibling disputes can also be prevented in advance, for example by having each sibling receive their own room or their own area. It is also very important to give siblings the feeling that they are being treated equally and fairly and taken seriously and that they are equally engaging with their children. It’s easier with a couple, so get together with your partner and discuss your children’s problems together. 

To prevent jealousy from engaging siblings or friends over a longer period of time. As a parent, you have already taken the first important steps on your way to the mediator and can observe and understand conflicts among children and thus effectively avoid quarrels.

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